JOINING THE CRAZE.

Jaykay, no tumblr for me. And actually, no more blog spot.

I retire from blogging, at least for a while. I don't really need to spill my emotions out, for no reason. I guess that's what friends are for, and I guess, it's what growing up is all about.

I've been growing up alot lately, and you know what, I need to change. I can't just be a bitch about it, and put it up here, hoping someone reads it, and confronts me, or something. I guess, idk.

Well, this time is the last time, to vent out. This is making me sad. I feel like for the past couple months, my life has been documented here. That everything important that has happened to me, has been put down on this place. My own personal journal. My own little bubble, to claim and sort my feelings. It's sad. Hahaha.

It's going to be hard not blogging, but older generations have survived without it. It's just one more step towards becoming a man. HAHA. Maybe one day, I'll just explode with emotion, and I'll need to put something down. Maybe here, or maybe on tumblr. Tumblr always looked so nice to me, but, I already have parts of my history as a teenager here. And I personally pick history > looks, when it comes to blogs. Hahaha.

It's funny, cause everyone's making a tumblr. Maybe I should make one. Idk. Maybe in time. But blogspot, you've been like, a human being to me. HAHAHAHAHA.

WHATTHEFUCK. THAT SHOWS HOW FUCKING SAD I WAS. HAHAHAHAHAHA. When no one was awake, and no one would listen, you would open up, and just let me spill. HAHAHA.

If blogspot were a human, we would be at like, 8th base right now. Hmmmm.

I don't want this blog to end D: My head is throbbing from the anticipation to close this chapter of my life. I feel like, I'm gonna be unstable without this port to shout out my feelings.

Maybe I'm just being a bitch. I've been a pretty big one lately, anyway. Hahaha.

Well, one last emotional trip, here it goes...

What is something, that my heart has been aching to scream. Hmmm...

I'm not ready to grow up. I was a little kid when I started this blog, and I still am. I've grown in alot of ways, but I still feel puny, I still feel that hole in my soul. But there is hope, cause I can feel that hole closing, you know? It's being filled with new-found passions, new people, new friends, old friends, my future, my family, my ever-so-thoughfilled mind, the tears, my fears, and my decisions.

I'll shape into a good person one day, just watch me.

Until then, goodbye blogspot. You have worked my thoughts out in so many ways. I could call you a brother I never had. HAHAHA.

I retire from blogging. For now.

Goodnight everyone, I love you all, and I miss the people who don't really talk to me anymore. I want to change that. I want to keep you an important part of my life.

LOLOLOL, I wonder what you think of this blog, Kirby-at-the-age-of-40. HAHAHAHA.

Just remember that your life kicked ass as a teenager, no matter how negative you feel. You had amazing friends, you had fun jobs, your summers are full of stories, your dreams and wishes have been fulfilled, you were as generous as you could be, you were as nice as you could be, you tried not to be annoying, you made people smile, you made people laugh, and that every morning, you woke up, and smiled and laughed too. And that your family loved you, and that people care about you, no matter what. Your teenage life, was the best it could be. Hahaha. Just so you know, Kirby-at-the-age-of-40, you cried alot at the age of 17. You realized so many things. You started to grow up. And you were proud of who you were. Wherever you are right now, Kirby, you better still be laughing and smiling. You better still be the best you can be. You better love your family, and you better be Kirby.

Goodbye, I love you guys.

Manaloto, out.

10/20/09 10:54 PM =]

Iron Gym!

Soooo...

No L, no D, and Iron Gym doesn't fit on my door.

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA.

Shoot. Time to sleeep. Work tomorrow, fml.

Look how cute I was. Lawl.

Monkey Boxers :D

I have been starting to notice that, I am becoming more independent. I eat dinner alone, I make dinner for myself sometimes. I bathe myself, lololol.

Well, I'm not really becoming independent. I am just starting to become a one man team. Eating dinner alone tonight made me realize that I have not eaten dinner with my family in months. Every night I come home from work, I eat dinner circa 1030pm. I really wanted to use the word circa. HAHA. Then, I wake up, and go to school. Come home early sometimes, eat lunch by myself, take a nap, then go to work. It's becoming pretty routine. Oh well. I never really find my self having time for things I like to do, i.e. Talk to mah fraaans and family, play guitar, play halo, talk to you, etc.

Man, I can't believe eating dinner alone made me feel like that. I am making things bigger than they should be, I presume.

Well, I shouldn't complain, cause at least I have a family, at least I have food to eat, at least I have somewhere to eat, at least I'm breathing, at least someone out there cares about me.

It's hard not to complain, when you take a lot of things for granted, huh?

Manaloto, out.

I am running out of titles for blogs!

Times are a changing, and things are rearranging.

Yay for apathy again :D

Does it surprise you?

Cause it surely surprises me.

I always thought that senior year was gonna be amazing, that everyone would be together again. That we would all hang out, and take pictures, and smile, and laugh, and be fine.

Well, lately, I haven't felt like that. I feel like work is sucking away the life, I once had. But other than work, I felt like I was losing part of my life to school. But other than school, I felt like I was losing part of my life still.

I think lately, I only feel like a handful of people care about me. That only a certain amount of family and friends truly care about me, that people are starting to just, not really acknowledge me anymore.

I honestly feel, different. I feel so much more things on me, trying to make me sad. And it sucks.

Work is already taking hours away, from anything I have left to do in life. That makes me sad too.

Hm, so pretty much, school sucks right now, and so does my status with friendships.

I really don't know what to say anymore. I just feel, blah right now. I feel like I should reach out and touch you, but I don't think I should. Whatever happens, happens. Whatever will be, will be, be it me becoming an acquaintance, or me being a shoulder to lean on. It's pretty much, anyone's call right now.

Goodnight, I miss you guys. Alot.

Manaloto, out.

P.S. - Thanks for everyone, who still makes my world turn. I wouldn't be much alive right now if it weren't for you.

HurryHurry!

If I blawwwwg, I'll be late for work, oh well.

Uhhh...Yeah, work is pretty fun now a days :D

Hmm, talking to you today, father, has made me really happy. I want to create a relationship that we have never had.

Uhh...I feel like I never talk to Bomban much anymore. Actually, I feel like I don't talk to anyone much anymore. I've been starting to feel like I'm not really part of that many peoples' lives, because of work and school. I feel like I've lost a big part of me.

Uhhhhm...I think I might have to be Kim's escort for her debut! I don't know if I'm happy, scared, or yeah. I'm excited!

Hm. Tyler, I really want you hang out with you alot again. I wish I was smarter, so I could halp you. Sorry about calculus and all that jazz, I can't help. Hahaha.

Hmmm. GYM tonight, but my wrist and elbow hurts. FML.

New protein jar :D HELLYEAH.

Hmmm...idk what else.

Time to go to work.

And by work, I mean, drive with my BA sunglasses and listen to Daylight.

Bye guise. See you soon, hopefully.

Manaloto, ouuuut.

Luh luh luh luh!