It seems like everyone's "theme" for sadness, is being alone. All of us feel alone. We feel alone when we think the bad things we think. Maybe it's just me, trying not to feel so alone. Fuck this keyboard, so fucking sticky. Fuck dude.
I always say, surround yourself with the people you love, the people who make you smile. If you do that, problems will be small, no matter how tall.
Recently, even though I've been around the people I love, I still feel alone. But when I'm with you, I know you care. I can feel it. I almost feel like crying, knowing you care so much. Other people, I barely feel any care. I feel like just another person. You make me feel important. I never want you to see me breakdown.
I don't want to seem like the center of attention, but I feel like people take me for granted. It sounds selfish, and high on my part, but I've felt like this for the longest time. I feel like, people always think that I'll be there. That I won't leave. Right now, I feel like crying, and just severing myself from everybody for a while. To get my mind and body into shape. But I'll just be alone again.
And then there's you. You've been my friend for years. Out of everybody, I feel like your voice has the greatest presence in me. Your voice is what keeps me sane. You keep all of the pieces in place. I can't see how I would be without you, Nesly. You have no idea of how I proud I am, that you have become such a devout Christian. You show me the truth, you show me the better.
I feel like the sadness bug hit me pretty early today. I think I need to be quiet for a little. Bye bye.
"You'll be okay, boy."
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deep.
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